Marriage and Wedding of Monba Ethnic Group

Brother of the bride’s mother stirs up the wedding

A Jialu love song goes like this: “mountains in the northeast are high, but they can’t block the sun in the sky; Parents have many powers, but they cannot stop their children from choosing mates.” Love and marriage of the Moinba youths are not over confined. Generally speaking, when the two parts are in love, parents of one part appear to invite matchmaker to bring two parties together. No matter taking a wife or a son-in-law, betrothal gifts are necessary. In old times, cross-cousin preferential marriage was very popular, which became a force of habit and made many lovers have difficulty becoming family dependants.

During the procedure of wedding, the brother of the bride’s mother is the most honorable guest and no one dares to provoke him. When the uncle appears, the bridegroom’s side should present a Hada (a Tibetan ceremonial silk scarf) respectfully to him and hastily invite him to the seat of honor. Then all kinds of foods are presented, especially head, tail, ears, heart, liver, lung and the four limbs of bull, pig and sheep should be complete, and not a single one of them can be dispensed with. The uncle must have pulled a long face and is very picky in every possible way: what is forgotten and not has been presented yet? Why is the thickness of the meat not even? Is it because my daughter has defects? Is it because as the uncle I did something wrong that you neglect me? Even if the bridegroom’s side takes very good care of him, the uncle should make trouble willfully: Why is the tea cold? Why is the wine hot? This shows that he is the plenipotentiary and the authority of the bride’s side, and he expresses his “anger” for marrying his niece to man of other family. The bridegroom and his side present Hadas, money and nice wine, and flatter him with fine-sounding words. When the uncle “stirs up” just about enough, he withdraws at right time. In real life, no uncle is going to stop his niece from marrying. The old custom has been passed on, and the arbitrary and humorous performance adds some temperament and interest to the happy wedding.